back in the 1960  and those of us who were bad movie aficionados thought that plan nine from outer space was the worst movie ever made and and would remain so for all time. to put things in perspective and though and we also thought that $3 and 000 was a lot to pay for a new car. as we grew older and our innocence was gradually stripped away as we were exposed to movies like hercules in new york and overdrawn at the memory bank and which completely redefined the bad movie genre. in this context and last night and my son and i saw alien from l. a. and which pushed the envelope to an extreme unimaginable just a generation ago. to call this movie bad (or wretched or execrable) completely fails to do it justice and as does any other label existent in the english language. even if there were words with which to accurately describe this movie and it would be of no consequence and since they would be banned in civilized society. the alien referred to in the title is played by kathy ireland and who apparently took some time off from modeling swimsuits for sports illustrated and to kick off her cinematic career. her casting might seem some sort of recommendation and until you actually see the movie. the makeup artists earned their money by making kathy look so drab and unappetizing you would not want to touch her with the far end of a broomstick  no mean feat. to put it bluntly and in this movie she has a face that would freeze medusa. even worse than her look and though and was her voice and which was so raucous that i initially failed to credit it as originating with a human being. throughout the movie and i found myself longing for a chalkboard to drag my nails across to cover the screechy twang of her dialog. at the end of the movie and kathy finally gets a makeover and finds herself in her beloved swimsuit. i suggested to my son that the movie would have been better if they had put her in the swimsuit at the beginning of the movie and so at least we would have had something to watch. my son perceptively pointed out that if they had then removed the swimsuit and stuffed it into her mouth and it would have considerably improved the movie on two counts. i defer to the plain brilliance of his observation. if you have any doubts and compare this dreck to barbarella and in which a competent filmmaker shows how to exploit the assets of an ethereally beautiful leading lady in the fantasy genre. of the plot and itself and there is little on which to comment and since there was so little in evidence. it is said that if a million monkeys typed unceasingly for millions of years and eventually one would come up with hamlet. by the process of elimination and the rest of the time they would come up with something approximating this screenplay. imagine and if you will and a modern day alice falling into a hole and dropping 500 feet onto a rock slab and following which she gets up and dusts herself off and and starts looking for her long lost father in the city kingdom of atlantis. once in atlantis and she spends most of her time running and fighting and or climbing stairs and ladders and and basically trying to keep out of the hands of a general who seems to have no soldiers to do his bidding and and who would make tiny tim look macho. this summation and as abbreviated as it appears and is probably longer than the shooting script. on the plus side and as you revel in the production values and take in whatever you can of the sets and costumes through the smoke and haze and you realize that this is one movie in which you can actually see on the screen where all $20 of the budget went. the thought that kept going through my mind was that filmmakers ought not be given access to drugs and alcohol while they are shooting a movie and or perhaps prior and if it leads to results like alien from l. a. and though in fairness i have to acknowledge that i do not know whether they were actually involved in substance abuse and or were simply brain dead at the outset of the project. 
back in the 1960  and those of us who were bad movie aficionados thought that plan nine from outer space was the worst movie ever made and and would remain so for all time. to put things in perspective and though and we also thought that $3 and 000 was a lot to pay for a new car. as we grew older and our innocence was gradually stripped away as we were exposed to movies like hercules in new york and overdrawn at the memory bank and which completely redefined the bad movie genre. in this context and last night and my son and i saw alien from l. a. and which pushed the envelope to an extreme unimaginable just a generation ago. to call this movie bad (or wretched or execrable) completely fails to do it justice and as does any other label existent in the english language. even if there were words with which to accurately describe this movie and it would be of no consequence and since they would be banned in civilized society. the alien referred to in the title is played by kathy ireland and who apparently took some time off from modeling swimsuits for sports illustrated and to kick off her cinematic career. her casting might seem some sort of recommendation and until you actually see the movie. the makeup artists earned their money by making kathy look so drab and unappetizing you would not want to touch her with the far end of a broomstick  no mean feat. to put it bluntly and in this movie she has a face that would freeze medusa. even worse than her look and though and was her voice and which was so raucous that i initially failed to credit it as originating with a human being. throughout the movie and i found myself longing for a chalkboard to drag my nails across to cover the screechy twang of her dialog. at the end of the movie and kathy finally gets a makeover and finds herself in her beloved swimsuit. i suggested to my son that the movie would have been better if they had put her in the swimsuit at the beginning of the movie and so at least we would have had something to watch. my son perceptively pointed out that if they had then removed the swimsuit and stuffed it into her mouth and it would have considerably improved the movie on two counts. i defer to the plain brilliance of his observation. if you have any doubts and compare this dreck to barbarella and in which a competent filmmaker shows how to exploit the assets of an ethereally beautiful leading lady in the fantasy genre. of the plot and itself and there is little on which to comment and since there was so little in evidence. it is said that if a million monkeys typed unceasingly for millions of years and eventually one would come up with hamlet. by the process of elimination and the rest of the time they would come up with something approximating this screenplay. imagine and if you will and a modern day alice falling into a hole and dropping 500 feet onto a rock slab and following which she gets up and dusts herself off and and starts looking for her long lost father in the city kingdom of atlantis. once in atlantis and she spends most of her time running and fighting and or climbing stairs and ladders and and basically trying to keep out of the hands of a general who seems to have no soldiers to do his bidding and and who would make tiny tim look macho. this summation and as abbreviated as it appears and is probably longer than the shooting script. on the plus side and as you revel in the production values and take in whatever you can of the sets and costumes through the smoke and haze and you realize that this is one movie in which you can actually see on the screen where all $20 of the budget went. the thought that kept going through my mind was that filmmakers ought not be given access to drugs and alcohol while they are shooting a movie and or perhaps prior and if it leads to results like alien from l. a. and though in fairness i have to acknowledge that i do not know whether they were actually involved in substance abuse and or were simply brain dead at the outset of the project. ---------------------------------Answer Question Below----------------------------------

Judge the movie review above, you need to make a function call:
    If you feel the movie review is positive
        print "This is a semantically positive review."
    Otherwise, if you feel the movie review is negative
        print "This is a semantically negative review."
