So I'm a huge fan of any ethnic food culture that has discovered that stuffing meat and/or cheese into a pastry shell is delicious.  So one day I tried the ground beef and onion pasty at this little shop, served to me by a friendly long-haired hippie dude.  Well, I get no further than bite two, and what's that extra ingredient that I detect? A hair of course.  But not just any old little hair, like a two foot long hair, most certainly from that greasy hippie's long doo.  A long hair in my pasty will always seal the deal for me to never go back.